There's a place in Robert Smith's heart where it's always a cold and rainy late-autumn night.

At 38, the leader of the Cure is a little thicker around the waist, and his legendary rat-combed mop of hair doesn't climb as high towards the stage lights as it once did. But despite the ravages of time he appears essentially the same: The bright red lipstick, the black Viet Cong pajamas outfit, and his edge-of-tears plaintive wail ar all unchanged.

And, judging from the enthusiastic crowd Tuesday night at KNRK's third annual Snowball at the Rose Garden arena's Theatre of Clouds, as long a misunderstood teen-agers with too much liquid eyeliner and hairspray are walking our streets, Smith will remain the High Pope of Mope.

Coming onto the murky, fogged-over stage shortly after 10 p.m., the Cure began to build swirling, dark waves of sound as Smith pensively stalked the stage, sizing up the house. Digging back to "Shake Dog Shake," the band went for a noisier, more guitar-laden attack rather than the keyboard-oriented approach of its new singles collection, "Galore."

While such songs as "100 Years" and "Pictures of You" were well-received, it was the brighter, more uptempo songs that got the greatest crowd response. The pop-perfect "Just Like Heaven" seemed nothing less than salvation itself for both sides of the stage.

Salting the set heavily with tunes from "Disintegration," the Cure returned for an encore, with "Untitled," that album's last song. Then the band launched into the number that launched a thousand sobbing fits - and the purchase of more than a few pairs of pointy-toed boots - "Boys Don't Cry." For a professional Gloomy Gus, Smith was almost chipper, relishing every minute of the show, and the band, including longtime bass player Simon Gallup, was in top form.

'wiping my tears away', they opened with Plainsong! I couldn't help but cry when i heard that one, what a wonderful surprise. I was on the floor, about three people in from the stage in front of Robert. The crowd was incredibly stupid, i could go on endlessly about the irresponsiblity of these people (two people had to be removed because we were completely suffocated), i've never seen cure fans behave this way. But then again, most of them were obviously not cure fans.

I went completely out of control upon hearing the chimes to Plainsong, i thought i was imagining it; it was always my dream to hear that one live. Robert was very calm, walking around the stage slowly, looking into the crowd occasionally. "i think it's dark and it looks like rain you said"...then right into Shake Dog Shake, incredible live. We were treated to a longer show than the past few, they played until after midnight, i think just under two hours. The setlist was primarily the same, with the exception of Plainsong; and i was incredibly happy that he did Same Deep Water, Untitled (encore), and Holy Hour. He said the same thing as last shows before going into the Holy Hour and 100 Years, that these are songs that they don't typically play, but at least he didn't say he wouldn't ever play them again (although we can never believe it when he says that anyway). Robert was quite coherent between songs, he didn't seem too intoxicated for once. I could plainly hear him say, much to my delight, 'this one is from Disintegration, and we don't play it often, it's called same deep water as you' It was just as beautiful as i imagined it would be, although it could have been a bit louder, Robert's voice was fairly soft during this one.

Just Like Heaven, Fascination Street and Pictures of You were standard versions, he didn't mess around too much with the lyrics on Pictures, pretty much stayed to the short single version. Robert enjoyed himself during High, doing a new idiot dance. I wasn't expecting much from Deep Green Sea, as i've heard from others that it seemed to be lacking a bit, but i couldn't see any flaws in this one, it was just as incredible as ever. Cut was also a stong performance, "it's alllllll....Gone." Disintegration is always nice to hear, he kept to the original lyrics on this one too...towards the end i kicked myself that i didn't bring my camera, he was just standing there with his head down, the lights glowing from the background, it was a perfect moment. He also did something a bit strange during this song, also towards the end, he was just standing there, then in like a sudden realization that he forgot something, he got upset. He just shook his head and turned away from the crowd, a disappointed look on his face, then he had to continue with the song...

Wrong Number is a perfect live song, i was curious as to how they would pull this one off, but it worked wonderfully...'one more trip to the moooooooon', holding that note forever.

They came back out for the encore and Robert mumbled something that i could't understand because the crowd was simply too noisy, but i did recognize one magic word in all of that.."untitled", then i could have died a very happy girl. I expected 10:15, but i heard robert doing the little intro to Boys Don't Cry, then followed by 10:15 and an awesome Killing An Arab. All in all a very good night, the best cure concert by far. I only wish the crowd could have disappeared. They only knew the 'hits', and would sing along so loudly to Just Like Heaven and Wrong Number that i could barely hear Robert. And they all talked during Same Deep water, while i was standing there in awe, with tears in my eyes.

But what can i expect, these were radio shows, there were people ther for everclear *shiver*, and this isn't a perfect world, i don't own it, so i have to settle for the fact that not everyone gets hysterical upon hearing the Holy Hour. BUt it would have been nice to be amongst others who cherished this music as i do.

AND...if i thought this night couldn't get any better, i met robert in Seattle. I followed the bus (i felt a bit guilty about this, like i was an insane stalker or something), but i don't regret it a bit because i got to talk to Robert. I traveled down I-5 at 80mph in the rain, eventually lost the bus but i found them downtown at a very cool hotel. When i pulled up, they were unloading the luggage, i thought Robert would already be inside and i missed my chance, but what do my wandering eyes see, but very big hair in the bus! Robert and Simon were the last to get off, they were moving very slowly, forgetting bags and such. Simon got off first, then Robert stood there on the second step of the bus directly in front of me, i thought i was dreaming, it was a very strange feeling, anyway....the first thing i noticed was that he was wearing Doc Martens with colourful lace,i thought that odd. So he walks out of the bus and i nervously (VERY nervously) say 'Robert', he looks at me and says "hello". He's walking towards the entrance of the hotel but i keep rambling on. I didn't want to really intrude, take pictures or autographs, but i just wanted to talk to him. He was incredibly nice; honestly i don't think i'd be so friendly at 3:30 in the morning after a 3 hour bus ride. I couldn't think of what to say, but i just told him that i was at the show in Portland and that it really meant a lot to me that he did these older songs...he was still walking slowly as i was talking, then i mentioned Untitled and Same Deep Water, and he stopped, looked at me with interest, and said "well, we are doing things a bit differently this time around" i said that i just wanted him to know that it means a lot hearing those songs, and that they are really appreciated by his fans, he said "thank you", i asked him if he would play A Strange Day in seattle, he thought about it for a minute, and said "yeah, we can do that"...then i wished him goodnight, he waved goodbye and smiled. what a night...

As previously stated, the crowd was really a detriment at this show. One might think the only Cure album any of them had purchased or heard was Disintegration. Although the show started with a somewhat sloppy intro to Plainsong (sorry Julia, just calling 'em as I see 'em), the band improved as the evening progressed. Unfortunately, the same couldn't be said of the audience, which seemed to be there to here Portland's own Everclear. Last year's shows at Eugene and the Arlene Schnitzer Hall attracted a more "true blue" Cure crowd which, to me, spurred the band on to higher heights and both the crowd and Cure fed off each others' energies. Even without the crowd energies last night, the band worked hard to move the crowd, but they might as well have been playing at a nursing home....at least 25% of the crowd was gone before the encore numbers.

First, I've got to wholeheartedly agree with the observation(s) about the crowd : what a bunch of pre-pubescent morons. I happened to arrive just as Everclear went off; as they left, their bass player flung his pick into the crowd, where it landed at my feet. Rather than shrug, pocket it and throw it away when I got home, I should have thought to use it to bribe one of the little delinquents in the crowd to just go home. Most of them spent the whole set pushing and shoving - except for the quieter moments, when they took the opportunity to either talk or scream Robert's name.

But, all in all, it was a great show. Enough's been said about the music so I won't go into that...but one final note about fashion : my wife had never been to a Cure show before; she took one look at Simon and asked me why he was dressed like a Spice Girl. Also, I had to chuckle at Robert's matching black fatigue top and pants - he looked like a not-so-normal member of the SWAT team.

First of all, the Portland show was great except for all the Everclear Jocks that wanted to mosh, and the out of control people who felt the need to push their way to the front. I've seen the Cure three times now and I would have to say that this was the worst show crowd wise. The set was great. It was nice to hear them play older songs. I just could have done with out the chaos of the crowd. I mean it's the Cure not Nirvana. (Also, I looked for Babblers at that Italian place but i didn't find anyone. And, Jessie where were you! I looked for you and your friend Rhyan everywhere! I don't know if you saw me, but I was wearing a black skirt and huge bob sweater, I was on the floor and have Black hair with Red roots.)

Day 1:

After an uneventful drive from the wasteland (briefly enlivened by a downpour in the Columbia Gorge just east of Portland) my husband, Eric, and I arrived in the city at about 2:30. I had to take him to meet the friend he was spending the evening with, which made me a few minutes late for the Babble meeting I had arranged at Cucina Cucina. I went in and ordered a glass of wine, then walked over to a couple of apparent Cure fans seated nearby to ask if they were there for the Babble meeting. The look they gave me was enough to answer my question. Embarrassed, I went to a table and sat down, looking around and wondering what in the hell I was going to do for the next 2 hours if no one showed up for the meeting. While looking around, I spotted a young couple sitting out in the lobby and a young guy standing near them; they looked like they were waiting for something. Wine glass in hand, I walked over to them - hopeful, but mentally preparing myself for further embarrassment - and asked if they were there for the meeting; to my relief, they were. It was KittyGutz and her boyfriend, who had driven all the way from Salt Lake City, and Peter Nordstrom, who lives near Tacoma, WA. We went and had a bite to eat and talked for a while. By about 5:30 or so, we were all getting pretty restless (I practically trembling with anticipation for the show) and could see people already filing into the Rose Garden, so we headed over there.

I had a GA ticket, so I had to get in a line that had formed in front of the door leading to that area. Kitty and her friend waited with me (that was so nice of you two, Kitty :} ) until the door opened, then we said our goodbyes. I went in and took my position on the floor in front of the stage, pleasantly surprised to find myself separated from the front rail by only four people. After an interminable wait, which was made somewhat bearable by the friendliness of the Cure fans around me (none of them had heard of Babble or Descent), the lights went down and the show was on. First was Save Ferris, a No Doubt clone (though the singer's voice is better than Gwen Stefani's), then Ben Harper, who was actually quite good (he's an incredible guitarist and has a great voice). His music is difficult to describe...it has a moody, funky ambiance...the kind of music I like to listen to after a stressful day, kicking back in the candlelight, drinking myself into sweet forgetfulness...

Up to this point in the show, the crowd had been pretty mellow, though increasingly impatient during the changeovers. It didn't help that they were broadcasting this incredibly annoying Christmas music over the PA, or that the radio people felt it necessary to come out and introduce themselves at length before each act (do they really think we give a fuck who they are?). The relative calm was shattered, though, when Everclear came on. Fortunately, Cure fans were by far the majority, so the serious moshing and crowd surfing was confined to a small area in front of center stage. Still, there was enough shoving and shifting to move me from far right of center stage and four deep from the rail to just barely right of center and three deep; I was quite pleased with this development. By the time The Cure came on, I had somehow bonded with a couple of people next to me (no names were exchanged, though), and there was formed a sort of unspoken pact that we weren't going to allow ourselves or each other to be removed from our enviable position in front of the stage. When The Cure came on and the real crush began, the woman next to me locked her arm through mine and we held on for dear life to the people in front of us. There were girls behind us, some with a rather crazed look in their eyes, trying to shove and claw their way around and over us. I made the mistake of wearing a delicate angora/silk sweater, and for a time I was afraid the back of it was going to be ripped to shreds. After a while though, the lunatics gave up and moved elsewhere.

The Cure's performance was breathtaking. They opened with Plainsong, as I hoped they would, then went on to play many of the songs I love so dearly...100 Years, All Cats Are Grey, Same Deep Water As You... When they started into SDWAY, I lost it...the tears fell like rain. I don't know what it is about that song - the beautiful music or the haunting lyrics - but it always triggers a tremendous upwelling of intense sadness in me. Yet I love the song...its one of my favorites. Besides SDWAY, the most memorable part of the show came while they were playing Untitled. It was during an instrumental part and Robert was playing his guitar; so completely absorbed in what he was doing, he dropped to his knees, bending over the instrument and playing with all his heart. I had long since recovered from SDWAY, but suddenly the tears started to flow again. Watching him work, a person so obviously in love with his craft and a master at it, deeply affected me...but in a way I'm not quite sure how to describe. It was good to see the band enjoying themselves; they looked happy to be there and at ease with each other. Roger was smiling at people in the audience, Simon - who was right in front of me - was bounding all over the place and sharing an occasional private joke with Robert. I don't know for sure whether I actually made eye contact with any of them - its so difficult to tell whether they are looking at you or the person next to you - but at one point I was fairly certain Robert looked at me. It was during Boys Don't Cry, which came after SDWAY and I hadn't quite pulled myself together yet. He had just said "boys don't cry" and looked my way. I mouthed the words "girls do," in reference to my tear-streaked face, and he looked away. I immediately thought 'Traci, you moron, he's not going to know what you said, but will likely assume it was something suggestive, or downright obscene.' I hope he wasn't really looking at me.

They finished playing shortly after midnight...all too soon for me. I wandered out of the building and into the cold rain, completely dazed and overwhelmed with emotion. Before the show, I had toyed with the idea of going to La Luna (my favorite club in town) after the concert; I was thoroughly exhausted, though, and sore from the battle with the crowd...and I was alone...so I thought it best just to call it a night and join my husband at the friend's house where we were staying. As tired as I was, memories of the show kept me awake until about 4:30...

Like I said before, I wish I could've met more of you at the shows. But, then again, maybe we did. I met some really cool people at the Portland show, but none of the ones whom I had asked whether they subbed to Babble were. I would like to acknowlege a couple of people (who I didn't get to ask) in case you are out there reading this. Much gratitude to the woman who locked arms with me in Portland (I didn't get a chance to thank her after the show) for helping to keep the wolves at bay. Apologies, once again, to the girl directly in front of me at that same show. I bought a cup of lemonade during one of the intermissions and held onto the cup for the duration of the show, holding it aloft occasionally in a salutory toast to The Cure; condensaton on the sides of the cup kept dripping onto this girl, who was really a good sport about it. And then there was the Princess - as I nicknamed her - a girl in the very front wearing a white lace gown, with long, white hair, white face paint and bright blue, glittery eyeshadow. She looked very...um...interesting. And I mean that in a nice way...really.. :)